If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
bring money and cleavage
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
