i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
