we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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