The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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