ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
