I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize