Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
