He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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