you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She announced her abortion via fbk
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
