well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Randomize