The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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