how can u be prego again
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
