I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
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