Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
