Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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