Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
