Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
