All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
