You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize