: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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