Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
