i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
