I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
A bitchslap is in order.
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