Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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