I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
