omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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