hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
