we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
