how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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