I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
