i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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