We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
