i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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