You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
