Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
