question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
