Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
