You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
