Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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