bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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