Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize