How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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