You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
