I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
