Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
