And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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