he thought i was a dude.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize
