I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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