You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
