so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It was like giving head to a cactus.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
And then my night got REAL pukey
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Randomize
